Post by Atheo on Feb 21, 2007 8:21:20 GMT -5
Here's a couple of poems I wrote- please give honest opinions! The first was written when I was a Christian, it's a reflection on the pain Jesus felt when we slew him at the cross.
Untitled
Life
Drown
Death
Burn
Trapped by all who seek him
Knowing what they’ll do to me
Still hoping for a reason
Why he could never set us free
Just praying to his father
As his time of death draws near
Wishing for another way to
Conquer all our hidden fears
Knowing they were coming
The very people he set free
Feeling all their anger
Hoping one day we would see
What could he be thinking
Feeling all their pent-up rage
As they strapped him to the cross
He could have flown free from our cage
As he was weeping
His tears dripping down through the world he made
Every single piece of him
Torn to shreds in an ugly charade
All he did was watch them
As they pounded through his hands
When he could have broken them
He unlocked our burning land
Betrayed by those who loved him
Even he who guided us
Forgiving those who slew him
To satisfy their burning lust
Did he cry out when they tore him
When they whipped and slashed his skin
Did he scream in pain when
They killed him in front of all his kin
Or did he stand there
Being killed by the men
He tried to save
Dying over and over and over again
Many Have Bled
Many have bled to the land of the dead
To reap what they have sown
Those that fall are not at all
Held by him who them owns.
In the pits of fire and the ice-cold mire
Men have yet escaped
To further their brood in the land they once ruled
In bloody explosions of hate.
There are they who daily pray
To be spared this terrible fate
It avails them naught, for when lost in thought
The Devil comes awake.
Clad in fire and robed in ire
The Beast throws up its head
Filthy teeth strung in a wreath
About its rotflesh dead.
Nary a roar comes from its core
Instead a sound of death
A thousand souls on red-hot coals
Dance in its leaden breath.
Insects swarm about the thorns
That bite into its flesh
It dissuades them not, for its anger hot
Is still unsated and fresh.
Its skin squirms loud with a pale white crowd
Of maggots, showing through the skin
Their movements slow as a great black crow
Eats them with a demonic grin.
To the Beast’s blind eyes as well come flies,
Feeding greedily on milk-white meat
Swiftly they burrow, leaving deep furrows,
As they dig ‘til the food is sweet.
Deep in its gut many spikes jut
Waiting to spear the unwary
Arises a stench when jaws above clench
Adding to the cargo it carries.
Deep in the acid is a lump of flesh flaccid
That moves to the beat of the heart
With every pump it spits out a lump
Of deformed, melted human part.
Loud are the screams of those, it seems,
Who are lucid enough to know fear
There are many in there whose minds are rubbed bare
Who simply huddle in madness sheer.
Some are pulled down to struggle and drown
By monsters, and these are ones one should envy
For the others, pain rending, but for these a swift ending,
Torn apart in a bloody, sick frenzy.
Many have bled to the land of the dead,
But no more, for the Devil has waken
The world held in terror for just one error
And lucky ones quick shall be broken.
Many have gone before the dawn
Of a reign of horror and pain
Now none shall stand in the Devil’s hand
For now and forever it reigns.
Life
Drown
Death
Burn
Trapped by all who seek him
Knowing what they’ll do to me
Still hoping for a reason
Why he could never set us free
Just praying to his father
As his time of death draws near
Wishing for another way to
Conquer all our hidden fears
Knowing they were coming
The very people he set free
Feeling all their anger
Hoping one day we would see
What could he be thinking
Feeling all their pent-up rage
As they strapped him to the cross
He could have flown free from our cage
As he was weeping
His tears dripping down through the world he made
Every single piece of him
Torn to shreds in an ugly charade
All he did was watch them
As they pounded through his hands
When he could have broken them
He unlocked our burning land
Betrayed by those who loved him
Even he who guided us
Forgiving those who slew him
To satisfy their burning lust
Did he cry out when they tore him
When they whipped and slashed his skin
Did he scream in pain when
They killed him in front of all his kin
Or did he stand there
Being killed by the men
He tried to save
Dying over and over and over again
Many Have Bled
Many have bled to the land of the dead
To reap what they have sown
Those that fall are not at all
Held by him who them owns.
In the pits of fire and the ice-cold mire
Men have yet escaped
To further their brood in the land they once ruled
In bloody explosions of hate.
There are they who daily pray
To be spared this terrible fate
It avails them naught, for when lost in thought
The Devil comes awake.
Clad in fire and robed in ire
The Beast throws up its head
Filthy teeth strung in a wreath
About its rotflesh dead.
Nary a roar comes from its core
Instead a sound of death
A thousand souls on red-hot coals
Dance in its leaden breath.
Insects swarm about the thorns
That bite into its flesh
It dissuades them not, for its anger hot
Is still unsated and fresh.
Its skin squirms loud with a pale white crowd
Of maggots, showing through the skin
Their movements slow as a great black crow
Eats them with a demonic grin.
To the Beast’s blind eyes as well come flies,
Feeding greedily on milk-white meat
Swiftly they burrow, leaving deep furrows,
As they dig ‘til the food is sweet.
Deep in its gut many spikes jut
Waiting to spear the unwary
Arises a stench when jaws above clench
Adding to the cargo it carries.
Deep in the acid is a lump of flesh flaccid
That moves to the beat of the heart
With every pump it spits out a lump
Of deformed, melted human part.
Loud are the screams of those, it seems,
Who are lucid enough to know fear
There are many in there whose minds are rubbed bare
Who simply huddle in madness sheer.
Some are pulled down to struggle and drown
By monsters, and these are ones one should envy
For the others, pain rending, but for these a swift ending,
Torn apart in a bloody, sick frenzy.
Many have bled to the land of the dead,
But no more, for the Devil has waken
The world held in terror for just one error
And lucky ones quick shall be broken.
Many have gone before the dawn
Of a reign of horror and pain
Now none shall stand in the Devil’s hand
For now and forever it reigns.